Two Guys on a Couch - Top 5 Overlooked Games

We take a look at what we think are the Top 5 most overlooked games of this gen in gaming.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Top 5 Overlooked Sexy Game Characters

We take a look at those characters that for some reason just dont make it on other peoples sexy list.
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Crysis Review

Crysis
Developed By: Crytek
Available on: PC
Reviewed on the PC

MAXIMUM REVIEW…

What’s that one game you wish you could pop in to make your PC cry out in pain trying to render every drop of its awesomeness… if you said Crysis, then no shit; everyone knows this game looks sick as hell, but is it good?

Crytek is a German game developer known for making the best looking games in the business after their breakout game Far Cry showed people how to render the most amazing jungles anyone has ever seen. The only problem with Far Cry is, it wasn’t good. It was like a B movie, where this time around Crytek wanted to do a first rate summer movie blockbuster and for the most part they delivered. On the surface Crysis is the most amazing looking game on the market. From its dynamically destructible jungle to its perfect normal mapped textures, to some of the highest poly counts you will ever see on screen, Crysis will be the benchmark for games for a good while. This game is great but it comes at a cost, you need one hell of a rig. My personal rig isn’t bad, a GeForce 8800, 3.0 Core 2 Duo and 4 gigs of ram, and I had some problems running it turned up. Now with just some minor tweaks it runs great but not everyone has a rig like mine and it’s on the low end of a “gamer” PC. Now that, that’s out of the way, how is the game itself? Well it’s actually a fairly good and unique shooter.

The Nano Suit give you the ability to go invisible, run fast, jump high, or take a lot of damage, and switching between the functions is as easy as holding the middle mouse button and dragging to one of the suit powers on the select ring. It’s fast, intuitive and easy to manipulate. Each suit function serves a specific purpose and you will find yourself jumping in and out of different ones often. Outside of the Nano Suit and amazing visuals this game doesn’t do too much else that is new. It has your standard weapons with a little bit of an advanced twist, that’s about it. Also once the aliens show up you don’t even get any cool alien weapons. Oh wait… yeah, we’ll get to the flying squids later.

The first part of this game has you infiltrating North Korea in search of some captured archeologists whom the North Koreans are using to dig up an alien artifact, while the second half has you fighting off the alien invasion you let out. Cool in concept, maybe not so much in execution. Fighting the humans is fine, even if their AI could have used a little more time in the oven. The pseudo open world feel that Crysis has gives you plenty of opportunity to play with your various suit functions to find the best way to attack your prey, while the tight shooting mechanics make picking them off fun as hell. The driving in the game, while not the best, is passable as long as it’s done in third person, but once you get into a flying vehicle it all falls apart. The flying controls feel broken and often I found that the V-Tol you pilot didn’t do what I wanted it to do. The cars on the other hand worked well and helped move you through the massive environments quickly. There are also some boats but I only found myself using them when I had to, just because you can’t really use your Nano suit on the high seas.

All the islands you hop through are well designed in a linear fashion that doesn’t seem like hand holding. You would think that looking at tree after tree would get old, but they throw in enough bases, ports or small villages to keep it fresh. It wasn’t until the alien spaceship where I felt the design went off the rails. The ship is a maze of zero-g tunnels with no rhyme or reason until you stumble out the other end. The only cool thing about it is the frozen jungle that happens after, but getting there is so poorly done it almost breaks the game. This is only one section and it only lasts about a half hour but it feels like it takes days.

The story itself about the North Koreans finding the aliens and the world Crytek built with the Nano Suit is cool but a little on the weak side. Nothing really gets to fleshed out and you never get much of an attachment to the other soldiers you’re with. It’s not the worst story I’ve seen, but not the best either. A lot of the sci-fi elements they weave into it could have been fleshed out more and more of a personal story could have been told. You do get a sense that they care for each other but you never get to know any of the characters so in the end you don’t care much for them. Although the characters themselves are a bit one dimensional the talent behind the voices is quite good.

From the Jason Statham inspired Joker, to the leader of the pack Prophet, each cast member has a great voice. All the sounds are top notch; it has nice bassy explosions and superb ambiance. One of my favorite things is the voice when you switch between your suit powers. In this robotic, beefy tone it shouts out MAXIMUM POWER or MAXIMUM SPEED, and makes you feel so bad ass. You would think after several hours of hearing this over and over it would get annoying but for me it didn’t. Thankfully Crytek gives you the ability to turn it off if you want, but why would you? My only gripe, and it’s not just this game, is the North Koreans don’t speak Korean! They do speak it if you’re playing on the hardest difficulty level but it shouldn’t be a difficulty option, it should be a sound option. I hate when you play a game and a foreign enemy is speaking English, it just takes you out of the setting a bit.

Overall, if you’ve got the rig, you owe it to yourself to get this game; its fun, unique, amazing to look at and solid all around.

Story: 6.0 -- Gameplay: 8.5 -- Graphics: 10
Sound: 9 -- Replay: 8 -- Fun factor: 8

Overall (not an average): 8.0 out of 10

 

-TuxedoKatsJoe

 

Left 4 Dead 2 Review

Left 4 Dead 2
Developed By: Valve Software
Available on: Xbox 360 and PC/MAC
Reviewed on the PC

BRAAAAAAAAINS….

Everyone loves zombies. How could you not, they’re cute and cuddly and want nothing more then to rip you limp from limp whilst sucking the sinew from your bones. Ok well maybe not the former but everyone loves them for the later, so what can Valve Software bring to the zombie table that hasn’t been done time and time again?

Those familiar with the first game wont be socked the second time around. Outside of four new characters, new locations, some new weapons and a few new modes, the game is, for all intensive purposes, the same. Run forward and shoot zombies in the face. Some may see this as bad but hey, if it’s not broke… For the uninitiated, what Left 4 Dead is, is a four player co-op zombie slaughter fest that takes place over five “films” or campaigns. Each campaign, about 45 to 75 minutes in length depending on difficulty setting and teamwork, it‘s presented as a movie with the ending showing your stats in a film credit style. Each film is broken up into four to five levels, depending on the campaign, each ending in a stand off where you have to wait for a rescue vehicle. The director system, which Valve instituted brilliantly in the first game, is back in full effect. This time, not only will it randomly generate zombies and re-arrange items, it will also rearrange your path so that you don’t take the same route every time you play a level. It works better then the first, adding more lulls in the action, building tension for when the horde is going to strike, while also adding flood moments that will throw endless amounts of zombies at you until you perform a specific action. One level has you running across a roller coaster to get to the end and turn it off while another has you racing through several levels of a mall to cut power to the alarm system. Each “panic” event is extremely intense and satisfying as you hack off zombie heads with the new melee weapons.

One of the simplest yet most satisfying additions to the game are hand held weapons, like baseball bats, police batons, or the ever trusty chainsaw. Combine this with the amazing freeform zombie destruction system and it’s a treat seeing your weapons rip chunks out of the undead to expose their gory innards. This isn’t like Dead Space where you can only hack of limbs; you can blow specific chunks out of each zombie to a level never before seen in games. Each ghoul this time around is fitted with an internal skeleton, so when you wind up and swing for the fences or unload your new shiny AK-47 into them, they splinter apart like rotten fruit exposing their goods; similar to the dynamic destruction to the environment seen in John Woo’s Stranglehold, or Red Faction Guerrilla. I myself, am a gore hound, growing up on horror films and Mortal Kombat will do that to you, and L4D2 delivers 110% in that department.

The extra beef Valve added to the Source Engine, with their dynamic body destruction to their AI directed level generator is great, but being that it is six years old now, it’s starting to show its age a bit. Although the game does look good with its spooky dark lighting and some the best character models in the biz, the environments can get a little drab in spots. There are some cool overlay effects like when you get hit with boomer bile, or are an inch from death and are seeing nothing but grey, but L4D2 doesn’t do anything that every other games doesn’t already do. The plus side is it runs great on a wide variety of systems, but the down side is it’s not going toe to toe with games like Crysis or Dead Space any time soon. Also in classic Valve fashion, there are no cut scenes. This can be looked at as both good and bad. I like that they weave the story into the environments, from the survivor notes in the safe rooms to the lone body covered in a sheet just out side of it, but in 2009 I expect a little more in the cinematic department. Outside of the great opening movie there is none of this in the game. Seeing how they present this to be a “movie” experience I would like to of had at least one at the end of each chapter; sometime at the end to give you a reward for surviving the brutal creatures would have been nice.

This time around they have the same boss creatures from the first, the hunter, witch, boomer, smoker and tank but they added a few more to break up the flow of the game, as well as add a new layer of challenge. The new jockey is a little shit that jumps on your back and rides you around, removing all control until a team mate shoots it off of you. This can be extremely deadly when combined with the new spitter who shoots out a toxic green slime that burns anyone who touches it. Add in the charger who rams and pounds anything in its path, and that’s one nasty bunch that’ll fuck up your party. The classic boss infected work the same way as before but have a new look to match the New Orleans setting.

There is one thing that all Valve games do great, and with no exception here, and that is the setting. You feel like you’re in the south. From the Bourbon Street inspired streets to the mucky swamps, this is “Naw-lins.” No two environments feel the same yet they all mesh so well to give you this authentic southern feel like no other game. A lot of games do great atmosphere, but the variety is always a problem; that’s not the case here. Also with Valves amazing community support there are tons of user maps as well as great, free, dlc maps to pick up.

Aside from the story, there is also a ton of competitive multiplayer modes. There is your, not so standard, verses mode where four people play as the survivors and four play as the special infected and you see who can last the longest on each level of a campaign. In survival you have to hold out as long as you can against the never ending horde of flesh eaters. In the new scavenge mode you have to collect gas to fill generators. Each is a new experience and new challenge that is very different from your standard fps online experience. Throw in the ability to control the infected and you have yourself something that never gets old.

If you loved the first one, you will love this one. Yeah, some may see it as a glorified map pack, but it’s not. They add a lot of new features, modes and game tweaks that it feels fresh. Also after spending just five minutes with this, it’s hard to go back to the first one. The characters are funny and engaging, it’s a great co-op experience, and even playing by yourself is a blast, even though the AI bots aren’t the smartest. For zombie fans or just horror fans in general this is a no brain… nope, not going there, it’s a must buy.

Story: 6 -- Gameplay: 9.5 -- Graphics: 8
Sound: 9 -- Replay: 9 -- Fun factor: 10

Overall (not an average): 9.0 out of 10

-TuxedoKatsJoe

Two Guys on a Couch - The Walking Dead Pilot Review

It's Halloween, well almost, so this week we bring you our review of the pilot episode of AMCs new show, The Walking Dead. Does this show live up to the Eisner award winning graphic novel or is it all dead inside?
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Two Guys on a Couch - RED Movie Review

We are back after a short hiatus with a review of the new Bruce Willis comic book movie, RED. Also we talk a little about Medal of Honor, Castlevania and Enslaved.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Sharktopus Review

This week our media review is our best yet... None other then the amazing-ness that is, Sharktopus!
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Two Guys on a Couch - Superman Batman Apocalypse Review

This weeks media review we look at the new animated movie from DC/Warner Superman Batman Apocalypse.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Media Review: Resident Evil Afterlife

This weeks media review we look at the fourth installment of the Resident Evil film franchise, Resident Evil Afterlife.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Capcom

The thrashing returns with The Angry White Man talking about his love hate relationship, with the video game giant, Capcom.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: Skyline & MegaMan Universe

This weeks trailer park we look at the upcoming alien invasion flick Skyline and the next game in the MegaMan franchise, MegaMan Universe.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Opposing View Reviews: Machete

This week we are trying something new, giving you two diametrically different views on this weeks film, Machete.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: The Walking Dead

This weeks trailer park we look at the upcoming AMC series, The Walking Dead.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Mafia II

This weeks media review we look at the latest open world game, sorta, Mafia II.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Theater: How to Kill a Zombie

This Thursday Theater we look at a short Called How to Kill a Zombie that George helped me make for a film class a few years back. We had to make a how to video and I didn't want it to be a basic one so I did this.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: I Want Your Money & Marvel Vs Capcom 3

This weeks Trailer Park we look at the political documentary I Want Your Money, and the next game in the awesome fighting game franchise, Marvel Vs Capcom 3: Fate of Two Worlds.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Piranha 3D & Kane and Lynch 2

This weeks media review we look at the horror schlock that is Piranha 3d and the viral video inspired action co-op game that is Kane and Lynch 2: Dog Days.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Theater: The Job

This week were trying something new with a Thursday Theater. This short was made five or so years with no money and friends who are not actors. Enjoy The Job.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park:

In this weeks trailer park we look at the new Bruce Willis DC comic book movie Red and the next adventure in the Bioshock saga, Bioshock Infinite.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Scott Pilgrim & The Expendables

In this weeks Monday Media Review we look at the latest comic turned movie with Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World, and Sly's action movie extravaganza that is The Expendables.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Online Games

In this weeks thrashing The Angry White Guy vents on them damn online games and the dicks that screw it up for everyone else.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer park: Sucker Punch & Sonic Colors

In this weeks trailer park we look at the new Zack Snyder film Sucker Punch as well as the new Wii exclusive Sonic Colors.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Tekken

In this weeks Monday Media Review, we look at the latest video game turned movie, Tekken. Is it as bad as Street Fighter Chun Lee, or is it more in line with the bad but watchable first Mortal Kombat?
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: Thor

This weeks Trailer Park we look at the Comic Con 2010 trailer for Thor.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Black Dynamite

This weeks Monday Media Review we look at the jive ass film that tries to embrace all that was bad about blacksploitation films of the 70's in Black Dynamite.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Comic Book Movies Volume 2

In this weeks comic con related rant The Angry White guys talks about what else, Comic Book Movies.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: DC Universe Online

This weeks Trailer Park we look at the epic 6 minute long cg movie for DC Universe Online.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Batman Under the Red Hood

This week we have a special comic con themed series starting with our Monday Media Review of Batman Under the Red Hood.    SPOILERS
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Message Movies

In this weeks thrashing The Angry White Man lays into movies with hidden messages, sometimes not so hidden.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: The Town & James Bond Blood Stone

In this week trailer park we take a look at Ben Affleck's second feature he's directed, The Town, and the new 007 game James Bond: Blood Stone.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Inception

In this weeks media review we look at the mind bending latest incarnation from acclaimed director Christopher Nolan, Inception. Also after the review we have a debate over the open ending.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: 3D

This weeks Thrashing has been a long time coming. It's 3D time. 
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

In this weeks trailer park we look at both the movie and game Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Predators & Despicable Me

In this weeks media review we take a look at the 1987 classic Predator, repackaged into the 2010 remake that isn't called a remake, even though it's obvious that's what they were going for, known as Predators. Also we look at the Steve Carell Animated romp, that begs the question do movies need a hero, known as Despicable Me.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: Rango & Clash of the Titans The Game

In this weeks trailer park we look at the new animated Gore Verbinski flick, Rango, and the game based on this summers Clash of the Titans.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: The Last Airbender & Singularity

In this weeks Monday Media Review we take a look at M Night's newest excitement filled flick, The Last Airbender, and Raven Software's newest Sci Fi shooter Singularity.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Talking at the Cinema

In this weeks thrashing The Angry White Man goes after those bastards at the cinema who feel they need to do everything but watch the damn movie.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: The Green Hornet & Homefront

In this weeks trailer park we look at the new Seth Rogan superhero flick, The Green Hornet, and THQ upcoming alternate history war game Homefront.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Knight & Day & Transformers WFC

In this weeks media review we look at the new Tom Cruise & Cameron Diaz action rom/com Knight and Day and finally, 25 years in the making a good Transformers game in the form of Transformers: War for Cybertron.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Foreign Films

In this weeks thrashing, George attacks the prestigious foreign film, and we see what life would be like if the real world was like Left 4 Dead.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: Resident Evil Afterlife & Silent Hill

In this weeks trailer park we look at the new trailer for the upcoming fourth installment in the Resident Evil movie franchise, Resident Evil Afterlife, as well as the eighth game in the Silent Hill franchise simply called Silent Hill.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Jonah Hex & Toy Story 3

In this weeks Monday Media Review we look at the latest comic to jump to the big screen, Jonah Hex, also we look at Pixar's latest masterpiece, Toy Story 3.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Friday Follow Up: E3 2010

In this weeks Friday Follow Up we take a look at this years E3. We talk about each of the major press briefings and give you our top 10 games of the show. This is a long one but we had a lot to cover.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Entitled Gamers

In this weeks thrashing George lays into people who just want everything for nothing. Also we find out what life would be like if it was a video game.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: The Sorcerer's Apprentice & X-Com

In this weeks trailer park we look at the new Nick Cage film The Sorcerer's Apprentice, as well as the newly envisioned X-Com.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: The A-Team & Joe Danger

In this weeks Monday Media Review we take a look at the new action orgy that is The A-Team. Also what do you get when you mix in 1 part Mario, 3 parts Little Big Planet and 5 parts ExciteBike? You get Joe Danger that's what!
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Two Guys on a Couch - Friday Follow Up: MTV Movie Awards

In this weeks episode we look at the 2010 Twilight Awards, brought to you by MTV. Also could our bad ass thing of the week turn into the first great video game based movie?
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: M Rated Games & Hate Mail

In this weeks Thursday Thrashing George attacks those parents who let their kids play 'M' rated games, plus Joe reads a nice love letter in his new segment: Hate Mail.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: Gulliver's Travels & Red Faction Armageddon

In this weeks trailer park we look at Jack Black's award winning film Gulliver's Travels and the trailer for the upcoming next installment in the Red Faction franchise, Red Faction: Armageddon.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Copout & Red Dead

In this weeks Monday Media Review we dust off a slightly older movie because we couldn't get out to the box office this week, so we look at Copout and finally find out what the hell everyone is soooooo ecstatic about when it comes to Red Dead Redemption.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Friday Follow Up (6/4/10)

In this weeks follow up we mourn for those who were lost this week, talk about some more Cap news, Michael Bay does TMNT, The Crow is back, a big anime studio re-launches the Cats, zombies invade the small screen, 3D is trying to make its home video push without James Cameron, is the Dreamcast really dead, what is Valve going to talk about at E3, and finally Crackdown 2 makes our bad ass list.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Pussing Up Vampires

In this weeks thrashing The Angry White Man sinks his fangs into those soul sucking vampire movies. Also we get an extra special message from the Twilight Guy.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: Piranha 3D & FEAR 3

This weeks trailer park we go deep into the 3D depth of the ocean with Piranha 3D and dig into the new live action/ game play trailer for one of the scariest action games around, Fear 3.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Prince of Persia Movie & Game

This weeks media review we see if Disney is the company that can bring a game to the big screen in Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time; also we see if UbiSoft can bring the prince back to form with Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Friday Follow Up (5/28/10)

This weeks follow up we talk a lot of movie news including Transformers 3, Captain America, Mass Effect, Hitman 2 and answer a fan question about Batman 3. Plus Valve makes the Bad Ass List.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Fan Boys

In today's thrashing, the Angry White Man attacks his most annoying adversary, the Fan Boy. Also we read from the most epically epic book of all time.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: Inception & Call of Duty: Black Ops

In this weeks trailer park we look at the latest trailer for Christopher Nolan's latest mind f**k, Inception, and also the next game to bare the Call of Duty moniker, Call of Duty: Black Ops.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: The Pacific & Alan Wake

In this weeks media review we storm the beaches with the troops of the last great war in HBO's The Pacific and fight the Taken with only our trusty flashlight in hand in Alan Wake.

Editors Note: We didn't mention the amazing sound track in Alan Wake. Poets of the fall provide such a great sound and mood in this game the compliments the ominous score. This is one of the few soundtracks I would actually buy.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Friday Follow up (5/21/10)

In this weeks follow up the Judge returns, in 3D, the Wachowski siblings make their return to cinema, a popular PS3 exclusive form this year jumps to film, and a special someone won't return for Transformers 3. Also, Dale Peterson is featured in this weeks bad ass of the week.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Comic Book Movies

In this week's rant, George cracks his bat over the skulls of them pesky shitty comic book movies. Also, Joe, flippantly reads from the greatest story every written.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: The Adjustment Bureau & Bulletstorm

In this weeks trailer park we look at the new Matt Damon film The Adjustment Bureau and slide tackle the hell out of people in the debut trailer for Epic's Bulletstorm.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Robin Hood & 3D Dot Game Heroes

In this weeks media review we head into battle as we learn how the man got the hood in Ridley Scott's epic Robin Hood. Also Atlus fully, and without shame, rips off one of the greatest games ever made, but is that a bad thing or a good thing as we tackle the PS3 exclusive 3D Dot Game Heroes.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Friday Followup (5/14/10)

In this weeks follow up we talk about some Sony news regarding two video game based movies, look at the bland Kane and Lynch poster, talk about the best Transformers news since the 1986 movie, go from double D to 3D with everyone?s favorite adult mag, plus hear a retro inspired rap.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Movie Based Games

In this weeks thrashing, George takes a bite out of those dreadful games based on our favorite movie franchises. Also, Joe just wants to know, when will a Twilight game be made.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: Machete & Medal of Honor

In this weeks trip through the trailer park we take a look at the fake grind house movie that became real, Machete, and phone home in the reinvented Medal of Honor.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Mega Man, Dead to Rights & Iron Man 2

In this weeks Media Review we look at the long awaited Mega Man fan film, Dead to Rights Retribution and both the Iron Man 2 movie and game.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Friday Follow-up (5/7/10)

In this weeks follow up we talk news about X-Men First Class, The Dark Crystal Sequel, Thor, JJ Abrams new movie, Team Fortress 2 Update, Gears 3 screens, Bad Ass thing of the week Mega Man Fan Film.

Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Video Game Movies

In this weeks thrashing George spews liquid hot hate from his pours as he lays into video game movies. Also, we continue our journey into the greatest novel of all time.

Two Guys on a Couch - Tuesday Trailer Park: Jonah Hex & Dead Space 2

In this weeks trip we take a look at a comic book western that I pray doesn't suffer from the Fox with Jonah Hex and the sequel to one of the best survival horror games of all time, Dead Space 2.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review: Nightmare Remake & Red Faction

In this weeks Monday Media Review, we give a brief review of the kung fu flick Ip Man and slash the hell out of the remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street. Also we open the vault and take a look at a great game from last year that didn't get its dues, Red Faction Guerrilla.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Friday FollowUp (4/30/10)

In this weeks follow up we talk about Scre4m, the new JJ Abrams/Spielberg collaboration, Red Faction meets SyFy, a local comic Ninja Bitch, and the bad ass thing of the week Alan Wake the WebShow.

Two Guys on a Couch - Thursday Thrashing: Know it Alls

In this weeks Thursday Thrashing, George literally blows his head talking about people who think they know what they're talking about but don't have a clue. Also we sit down with Edward and Bella for a nice meal in the greatest story ever told.
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Two Guys on a Couch-Trailer Park (4/27/10)

In this weeks trip we look at the new M. Night Shimyshamalon's new movie The Last Airbender as well as a potential sleeper hit or disastrous game, Sniper Ghost Warrior.
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Two Guys on a Couch - Monday Media Review (4/26/10)

This week we have a smorgasbord of stuff for you. We start with this weeks box office flop, the 4th place Losers, appropriate title. We then follow that with a South Korean sleeper from 2008, The Good The Bad The Weird. Also we kiss some STEAM ass as we talk about two indi PC games The Misadventures of P.B. Winterbottom and Trine. This is the most jam packed 20 minute show we've done!
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Two Guys on a Couch - Friday FollowUp (4/23/10)

We cover much news. Jason's Dead? The Rock doing action, Batman 3D, MIB 3D, Batman Game Characters, Captivate 2010, Earth Day BS, Next Weeks Review, and the F'ed up thing of the week.
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Thursday Thrashing - Movie Critics

In this week George goes ape shite on them dastardly movie critics. Also the reading returns of the most epic story ever told.
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Tuesday Trailer Park - The Good, The Bad, The Weird & Crysis 2

In this weeks trip we take a look at an South Korean epic The Good, The Bad, The Weird and a sci fi epic in its own right coming to a gaming console near you this holiday season, Crysis 2.
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Monday Media Review: KickAss, SC Conviction & Dark Void Zero

In this weeks Monday Media Review we fight f'ing crime with Kick-Ass, Jack Bower the Hell out of some terrorists in Splinter Cell, and go back in time for an 8 bit classic made in the 2ks.
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Two Guys on a Couch: Friday Follow-Up ( 4/16/10)

In this Friday edition we run down some Marvel Comics movie news, some Gears of War 3 action as well as FEAR 3 and Bulletstorm. Plus the bad ass thing this week, 2.5D Megaman.
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TWO GUYS ON A COUCH: THURSDAY THRASHING - REMAKES

George damn near blows his lid talking about remakes. Plus a little reading from the greatest story ever written.
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TWO GUYS ON A COUCH: TUESDAY TRAILER PARK (4/13/10)

In today's trip we take a look at The A-Team and the PS3 exclusive 3D Dot Game Heroes.
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THE DARK KNIGHTS OF EA RETURN

Vince Zampella and Jason West Return to their former home at Electronic Arts. Still in a lawsuit with Activision over the Call of Duty franchise, these former heads of Infinity Ward and the creators of Call of Duty go back to their old stomping grounds and the home of Medal of Honor. EA went so far as to give them their own studio Respawn Entertainment, but they didn't announce any projects. As a fan of both Call of Duty and the last Medal of Honor they worked on, Allied Assault, I can't wait to see what they show off next. I just hope it's better then MW2 because that single player sucked compared to the first one.

-TuxedoKats Joe

TWO GUYS ON A COUCH: MONDAY MEDIA REVIEW (4/12/10)

In this double dose of Japanese awesomeness we review the gore fest that is Vampire Girl vs. Frankenstein Girl and the blue bomber makes his return in Mega Man 10.
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PERCY JACKSON TO TAKE ON PETER PARKER

HitFix has reported that Sony has put a face to the new reboot of the Spider-Man franchise, Percy Jackson himself, Logan Lerman. Marc Webb, I'm sure his name was a bigger selling point the his empty resume, is going to helm this future .... can I say disaster in the making? I am looking forward to a new Spidy movie, I love Spider-Man, but outside of the 2nd film, the movies have sucked. Yes the first one was a break through because it banked a shit ton of money but the movie was gar-bitch, sorry to burst your bubble. Spider-Man vs the Green Ranger, um what? I just hope they take the wit from the comics and make him a sarcastic s.o.b. I have a little trepidation because they are going back to high school in I guess a new origin story, lets hope they stick to that and have him and Gwen fall in love then kill her ass off like the comics did. Oh and thank god that hack of a director Raimi is gone. HIS MOVIES SUCKS ASS. Yes Spidey 2 was good but that's what 1 out of 16. Yes, Evil Dead is fucking awful, it's a fan boy fave but it's still shit. Lets hope Webb can spin this one better then Sam. Look for Spidy to swing into 3D theaters everywhere July 4th weekend in 2012.

-TuxedoKats Joe

TWO GUYS ON A COUCH EPISODE 105 part 5

A little recap on some news stories from Wednesday and a look at what were doing next.

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TWO GUYS ON A COUCH EPISODE 105 part 4

This week we give a thrashing to people who like to compare shit. Also our first reading from a great American classic.
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TWO GUYS ON A COUCH EPISODE 105 part 3

In this edition of Wednesday's Words of Wisdom we talk Gears of War, Resident Evil Afterlife, Doctor Who debut, some lay offs with Sega, and the weekends Box Office.
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TWO GUYS ON A COUCH EPISODE 105 part 2

This weeks Trailer Park we take a look at The Expendables and Spider-Man Shattered Dimensions.
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TWO GUYS ON A COUCH EPISODE 105 part 1

The start of our new format. This Monday edition we review Clash of the Titans and God of War 3, plus a look at Lead and Gold. Check back in each day for the following parts of the show.
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TWO GUYS ON A COUCH EPISODE 104

In this episode we talk.... New Moon... fuck, also lots of 3D news including Jack the Giant Killer and Nintendo 3DS. We also review the games Metro 2033, and Just Cause 2.
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Showcase of the Dead

In 2003 writer Robert Kirkman created a black and white monthly comic called The Walking Dead, a post zombie apocalyptic story of a group of people lead by Rick Grimes, a police office that wakes up from a coma. Sounds pretty standard if you think about it, but this isn’t your average zombie story. What makes this story different from other zombie comics is the human element. Behind the zombies is a true dramatic story of survival and relationships.

With that said, AMC announced that Frank Darabont (The Shawshanck Redemption and The Green Mile) will serve as writer, director and executive producer for The Walking Dead T.V. series which first season will be comprised of six episodes..

And while I’m stoked about this my question is why hasn’t this been done before? There’s been numerous T.V. series about vampires, werewolves, demons and damn near everything in between.

So, why not zombies?

If there was anything that should have had a series by now it should have been zombies. Zombie stories have the ability to tell not only a tale of horror but a tale drama, suspense, intrigue and emotional turmoil, like Lost except for being good.

The one thing that does confuse me, is why AMC? If you read the comic then you would know that The Walking Dead isn’t for a broad audience. It has gore, cussing and nudity, everything that says that it should be on HBO or Showtime. Will they cut back on the gore? They could, but come on, it’s zombies. They will be able to use “shit” but anything “fuck” word related is gone, and forget nudity.

While these things could be forgiven, my biggest concern is how will they change the story? Or more precisely, will they change the story? It’s just simply way too early to know. All we can do now is cross your fingers and pray. And, if it is good, then pray for a bunch of knock off series.

Buck Rogers in the 25th and a 3D Century

Growing up nerd, there were a few shows that I loved with a passion and still remember fondly to this day; the original Star Trek, Battlestar Galactica, Space 1999, The Greatest American Hero, V and of course Buck Rogers in the 25^th Century (Oh, Erin Gray how I miss your skin tight suits).

Battlestar Galatica and Star Trek: TNG will forever be remembered along with the originals. The upcoming V still needs to prove itself, but it has made one hell of a first impression.  The Greatest American Hero may or may not be turned onto a movie, depending on what you read and where you read it, staring Nathan Fillion who’s pushing for it. Space 1999, if remade, will have to have a new name.  Now, from the man that brought us greats like Mortal Kombat, Resident Evil,  DOA, and AVP comes Buck Rogers in the 25^th century.

That’s right; Paul W.S. Anderson has signed on to direct the remake of the classic sci-fi series. Now, I could go off on a rant about how bad Anderson is but then I would be a hypocrite. See, I actually like some of Anderson’s films. While not the greatest film maker by any stretch of the imagination, he has directed a few movies that were enjoyable; Event Horizon, Soldier, Death Race and I’ll even go as far to say the first Resident Evil would have been good, if it wasn’t called Resident Evil. So, it’s pretty much a hit or miss with this guy, and because of that I’m not going to make some assumption that Buck Rogers is going to be bad. People who do that are simply retarded and judgmental. I’ll wait to see the trailer or at least production stills before I start to decide what’s what.

What I do know and what has already been stated is the Anderson will make this movie 3 fucking D, much like what he’s doing with Resident Evil: Afterlife (or Resident Evil: Bastardization). Now, I’m not calling for a boycott, those are just fucking retarded, but I’ve already told myself that I won’t be seeing any more Resident Evil movies in theaters as long as Sony and Anderson hold the titles and keep bastardizing it. Only way to make them stop is to stop seeing the movies. I am willing to give him some benefit of the doubt when it come to Buck Rogers only because I really liked Event Horizon, but what I won’t forgive is 3D. As long as the price is cheaper to see the same movie in 2D, then that’s where you’ll find me.

-TuxedoKats George

VIRTUAL BOY: DON'T CALL IT A COME BACK!

This week the big N announced they are bringing out another hand held, because we cant go 6 months without a new one, and this one will be 3D!!!!! If you've read our other blogs you know we hate 3D. This new 3DS, yes that's what its called, is going to be more powerful then the DS and DSi, well its fucking new i hope it's more powerful Nintendo, and will be fully backwards compatible with both of them. This 3D system is also is not going to use glasses. That's all the news they gave, guess we have to wait for E3 for more info. Lets just hope this one is in color.

-TuxedoKats Joe

Episode 103

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In this episode we talk Splinter Cell Conviction, Metro 2033, Kane and Lynch the game and movie news, Tron Legacy, and review Repo Men.

MICROSOFT SAID THEY TAKE IT TWO AT A TIME

 Recently in a supposed leaked document from Microsoft, they are going to let gamers plug USB flash drives into their 360's to expand their hard drive space. Supposedly you can only use 16 gig or less drives but you can plug in two at a time, that's what she said, so that's cool. But seriously please Microsoft take a note from Sony with your next console and let us put any hard drive in.

-TuxedoKats Joe

NOBODY SURVIVES FOREVER

It's still a ways out but I am excited for the new Left 4 Dead 2 DLC "The Passing." In this new piece you run into 3 of the 4 survivors from L4D1. A little later Valve is going to be releasing some DLC for the original L4D where you have to make a choice on who you want to sacrifice from the group because someone has to die. THAT IS FUCKING EPIC INTERCONNECTED STORY TELLING!!! I love you valve. L4D2 was one of my fave games from last year. Even though I lost a little interest of late, it's still so fun to hop in a game and kill waves of zombies. This new DLC will most definitely bring me back.

-TuxedoKatsJoe

LETS PLAY SCC

I play through with commentary the demo for Splinter Cell Conviction. We just filmed episode 3 of our web show and in it we talk about the new Splinter Cell Conviction demo. Here's a Lets Play with commentary.

-TuxedoKatsJoe

EPISODE 102

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In this episode we review Green Zone and the games Bad Company 2 and the DLC for Resident Evil 5. Our trailers of the week are Iron Man 2 and Transformers: War for Cybertron. Talk a little about Oscar wrap up and GDC 2010, plus a little rant on facts.

Survival of the Dead review

George A. Romero. His name is synonymous with zombies. You can not say one without thinking of the other. He created zombies as we know them today and for that I respect him and I am grateful to him.

He has given us, whether you like them or hate them (hate), legendary movies (thanks to nostalgia); Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead and Day of the Dead as well as legendarily bad films like Land of the Dead and Diary of the Dead. Now he has a new “masterpiece” Survival of the Dead.

I just want to start by saying that Survival of the Dead might just be Romero’s best film, but that’s not saying a whole lot with his track record. I know that many will argue that point by saying that Night of the Living Dead is his greatest film and I will, of course, disagree and tell them that nostalgia is warping their view, but you can read that in another blog. Night of the Living Dead, while being a stroke of genius, was a terrible film even for a low budget. But, this isn’t a review for that movie so back to Survival.

Story:
Survival of the Dead follows the National Guard’s men that were briefly in the Diary of the Dead movie, which I have to shoot Romero kudos for that little bit of creativity, but they are more of a side story. The main conflict is between to Irish families that live on a small island named Plum Island. The two families are rivals, but had a long truce that broke when the dead started to walk. The O’Flynns felt that the dead should stay dead while the Muldoons felt the dead should be kept around until a cure can be found. The Muldoons won in the end and sent the head of the family, Patrick, away where he found the National Guards men and returned to settle the score. On the surface it’s not a bad story (not great either), but like all of Romero films he tries to place his social commentary into it. Dawn was anti-commerce, Day was anti-military, Land was anti-rich and Diary was just fucking bad. This film speaks out against two things, revenge and war. Mostly war. I would go into details why but I feel that I would have to reveal way too much of the film and I hate reviewers that tell you the whole story. If you watch it, you’ll know what I’m talking about. I would like to point out is that I believe that Romero has grown up a little when it comes to our men in uniform. The National Guard’s men where shown in a positive light and that is a major step away from the way he saw them in Day. But, this story isn't without faults, there are some huge WTF moments, some down right cartoony moments and some plot holes you could drive a SUV though, just watch out for them.

Characters:
For the most part they were not just likeable, but believable, which again is saying a lot. For example, one of the main characters, Col. Crockett, first comes off as a hard ass but you quickly come to understand that there’s a lot more to him then that and you come to respect him. Each character seems to have this about him/her, a hard surface with a gooey center. You know, “character development” something that was really lacking in all of Romero’s other films. Which makes me ask the question, did Romero finally take a class in screenwriting and story telling? If so, then his teacher needs to give him a gold star.

Special Effect:
Better then some worse then others. There where times when the Special FX were top notch, but then at times you simply ask why (these are the cartoony moments). For the most part they're watchable, but I will always have problems when zombies can easily rip apart people from not only the limbs but also the torso. Sorry, bodies just don’t work that way.

Overall:
After the abomination that was Land of the Dead and Diary of the Dead, this movie really surprised me and was a real improvement over the last two films. I liked it, hell I even enjoyed it and I would recommend it for rental, easily. A buy? Probably not, but it's defiantly a movie that you should check out if you have the time.

I gave this movie 3 out of 5 stars

-TuxedoKats George

It has come to my attention, through my partner, that I might have given this movie a higher rating then it deserves, and after much thought I have to agree. The reason I gave this movie a 3 out of 5 was due to the fact that I was comparing it to Romero's other diarrhea inducing films. And, while I feel that, compared to those dung droppings, this movie is indeed a 3, I feel that compare to good films this movie should be at a 2, possibly 1 1/2. I still stand by my review, but I'm sure that TuxedoKats Joe would have much more to say about this film..

When the Muppets come marching home again, Hurrah! Hurrah!

Once ago, in a time long forgotten, the Muppets were loved and cherished by the young and old alike. Then sadly one day a great tragedy occurred.

The death of their creator Jim Henson. This was a man unlike any other. A man that redefined the puppet into iconic characters, creating breath taking worlds, reinventing special FX creatures for movies an redeveloping the children show so they don't talk down to them. He touched all our hearts in one way or another so much so that even The Smithsonian Institution Traveling Exhibition Service has Jim Henson’s Fantastic World. We love the Muppets so much that their popularity is so expansive that the Muppet characters have been treated as celebrities in their own right.

Jim Henson was not only the creator of the Muppets, but he was their heart and soul, and this proved to be more true then not when Disney tried to continue making movies each with a box office flop.

• The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992) - $27,281,507
• Muppet Treasure Island (1996) - $34,327,391
• Muppets from Space (1999) - $22,323,612
• The Adventures of Elmo in Grouchland (1999) - $11,634,458

Try as they may, we all knew the sad truth. The magic was over...

Or was it?

Flashforward 12 years. The people who grew up loving the Muppets, not as money makers but as themeslves have stepped up to the plate to take the Muppets back to their start. The way Jim Henson would want them to be, or so they say.

John Segel, (the naked guy from Forgetting Sarah Marshall) has signed on to not only co-write but now star in the upcoming The Greatest Muppet Movie of All Time which will be directed by a pretty much unknown, James Bobin. Nothing is really known about the plot except that Segel plays a man on a quest to find and reunite the Muppets.

Will this be a good Muppet movie at last? I can't say. But, what I will say is that, for the first time since the death of Jim Henson, I have hope.

-TuxedoKatsGeorge

COCAIN'S A HELL OF A DRUG

Crackdown 2 has a date!!!! July 6th. I loved the first Crackdown and cannot wait for this new one. Even though this game is being done by Ruffian Games and not the original team at Realtime Worlds because they are busy with their crime based MMO All Points Bulletin (APB) but I hope this new group of guys will deliver the goods. I mean just check out the trailer they showed at the VGA's and tell me this doesn't look like a blast!

-TuxedoKatJoe

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